A2: ALTERNATIVE TV: Strange Kicks

Release: 1981 (I.R.S. Records)

Acquisition Details: Mid-90s from used record store? Must’ve been bought during attempt to get any possible punk product for cheap. Loved ATV’s weirdo single, “Life,” (“Life’s about as wondaful as a dead tramp lyin’ in the road”) and found “Action Time Vision” fine.

Mystifying Lyric: From “T.V. Operator”:
I’m as dull, dull, dull, dull, dull as a Belgian miner [minor?].

The LP’s jaunty in places, with decent guitars, and I gotta say I like Mark Perry’s vocals a lot, very English. But the most notable moments are the songs with predominant keyboards, including two with Farfisa organs (I think) on side two. The other synthesizer has, I suppose, a proto-techno texture, and it’s the nicest part of the song. So, while the record’s not annoying, it’s not really worth any effort. This is one of many personal lessons in learning that “punk” turned into “new wave” around 1980 or so (convenient, that), and I don’t appreciate the sonic qualities of ‘80s music anywhere near as much.

Mixworthy: n/a

Verdict (Courtesy of the lyrics from“Who Are They”):
They’re headed in a record store/
Surely life must be better than this.

The question is will anyone buy it back?

A1: ATTILA

Release: 1970 (reissue Back-Trac Records, 1985)

Acquisition details: 1990 or 1991. Seems like I got it in Germany, though I’m fairly sure that’s a false memory, and I got it earlier in Durham. Purchased new, but at discount price ($4 or so). Bought because cover (see below) drew my interest. Got my sister a copy later.

Embarrassing liner notes: “Attila: Is the most remarkable group on the scene since the Huns sacked Europe. There are only two men in the group, an unlikely number for a conquering horde.”

“[The vocalist] (Taurus) is twenty-one, single, and only sweats two things: perfecting his sound and South East Asia.”

“As they worked, a new feeling crept into their music. There was resentment and hostility at a world that locks new music away in the basement. Hostility toward all the people who say no to new sounds before they hear them. … What they are mad at is complacency, and all those without imagination.” (-Tom Paisley)

There are other Attilas: in case you’re confused, this is the one that included Billy Joel before he was Piano Man. Attila was a duo that featured Joel (the aforementioned Taurus) on organ and vocals and another guy named Small on drums. It’s not quite as bad as it sounds, in fact some bits groove along like the rhythmic parts of “Frankenstein.”

But the first thing you notice is the cover, where the two band-mates stand in medieval (not Hun-like) armor amidst hanging sides of beef. The second thing you apprehend is the fuzzed up organ, very similar sounding to the one in “In-a-gadda-da-vida,” except when it sounds like an electric guitar solo (which is pretty amazing in a bad way). Then you become aware of Billy Joel screeching in a manner standard to heavy metal band vocalists about ’68-72, like Uriah Heep or Deep Purple, I’d say. Then you realize the godawful nature of the lyrics. The doggerel really makes you appreciate Joel’s later lyrical sophistication, even if you hate his corniness.

From “Wonder Woman”:

Wonder woman with your skin so fair
Wonder woman with your long red hair
You have the velvet touch
You have what I want so much

Far worse, from “California Flash”:

He jumped out on the stage
He knew he had everything made
He broke out into a song
Oh, he couldn’t do nothin wrong
Then he started doing a dance
Said it was imported from France
The girls all started to prance
To see the California Flash movin’ his pants.

Side one is listenable until the last “song,” a 7:39 instrumental called “Amplifier Fire [geddit!?]: Part 1, Godzilla; Part 2, March of the Huns.” It sounds a lot like a Hammond organ mimicking a contemporary jazz guitarist (electric). Side two sounds a lot like what I’d imagine a Rick Wakeman solo album would sound like, were I ever to be unfortunate enough to listen to one.

Mixworthy: In my younger days I always thought I’d put “Wonder Woman” on a tape for a red-headed girlfriend, if I ever had one. I did (redhead) and did not (put the song on her tape). I had wised up by then, I guess.

Verdict: Keeper, but really only because it functions as a historical curiosity for both my past as well as Billy Joel’s.

Records' Records!

A confluence of several events has inspired the resurrection of Fats Durstonia: a completed move; lots of baby care responsibility at home; the fact that our landlords left behind a snazzy record player with a repeat function. (The blog’s neglect has been the fault of a number of time sucks: moving, dissertation, work, baby care, and, most/worst of all, video games.) In blatant imitation of a couple of other blogs (one now on hiatus itself), I’m gonna work through my record collection, in approximate alphabetical order, trying to listen to three or four per week. If you have records, you know that you must keep them in some order, or you’ll never find them via their skinny little labels. So “A’s” are with “A’s,” “B’s” with “B’s,” and so on, but they won’t be strictly alphabetized as that would be more work than I’m willing to put in.

After moving my really heavy record collection (two crates and two boxes), and knowing another move is imminent in 2006, I felt that I really needed to get some more use out of them. Baby-proofing had resulted in the disconnect of speaker wires a few months back, leaving headphones the only viable option for record listening, and everyone knows headphones are for iPod/computer mp3 listening. Although I love my records, though there are certainly a number that could be gotten rid of … and there are a few I’ve never heard all the songs on (Tonio K, I’m lookin’ at you). Each record will get the dignity of at least one full listen through, maybe more.